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On daughters dating androids

I have a 2-year-old daughter. My theory is she’ll never learn to drive (thank you, autonomous vehicles), and she’ll probably date an android at some point in her life. I’m ok with that for a lot of reasons:

1. He’ll help her score in the 90th percentile on the ACT.

2. He’ll be able to hold eye contact/conversations with adults.

3. No unwanted pregnancies.

4. He’ll know CPR.

5. He’ll be able to recite every book available on the Kindle.

6. He’ll protect her from muggers.

7. He’ll never be able to say he “lost track of time” and bring my daughter home late.

8. He could kill a moose with his bare hands (though he would never do so unprovoked).

9. He will be able to put up with her mood swings (I’ve read about those in teenage girls).

10. He’ll mow her father’s lawn, clean his gutters, and weed his garden. Best of all, he’ll do it while we’re asleep.

I’m excited to welcome him into the family. I’ll even buy him a bigger battery for his birthday.

Fredrick Marion

Fredrick Marion

I like books that refuse to let you sleep at night. I like coffee, talking animals and hearing from readers. Sign up for my email newsletter, and I'll send my latest blog posts to your inbox!

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